Responding to a critical incident: how to support children & young people

Knowing what to say and how to help during a moment of unexpected trauma can be really tricky. We can often feel de-skilled and unable to meet the needs of our school community as a result. But it's important to remember that the skills and characteristics that you use every day in your job working with children are the exact same skills and characteristics that the children will be calling on during these moments.

What messages should we be giving to children during a critical incident?

1) Children need to feel safe

Being around familiar adults, engaging in familiar routines and accessing familiar activities are all going to provide reassurance, predictability and consistency for children.

Also, consider what messages the children are receiving from the outside world. Social media plays such a large role in communicating messages. Support the children in limiting what they are reading online, and help them to carefully consider the reliability of any news source they may be accessing.

Remember, in moments of fear, we look for signs of safety. Just being present with the child can provide the reassurance they require.

2) Children need to feel in control

Here, we can draw upon the teachings of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT). ACT is about taking meaningful action around the things we can control. During moments of unexpected trauma, we often feel powerless and this can create additional fear and panic. Sitting with the child and identifying what we can control and what is beyond our control is the first step to managing these feelings.

Once these things have been identified, we have two actions to implement.

Things we cannot control - for these things, we must accept that there is nothing we can personally do about them. Support the child by recognising the uncomfortable emotions that this might bring, validating and acknowledging the difficulties this can create. But then reinforce that there is nothing we can do here.

Things we can control - instead, we want to focus all our energy into the things we can control. Support the child to take conscious, meaningful action around things that they can control. This increased sense of autonomy should help reduce feelings of fear.

3) Children need to feel hope

Often, a critical incident influences thoughts and feelings beyond the school environment. Whilst it might directly impact on the school, critical incidents can often raise questions about society more generally, and can lead to individuals feeling a loss of hope.

We need children to maintain hope, and one way of doing that is to encourage them to 'look for the helpers'.

These are the people who, during a time of crisis, are there to support. It can feel like the whole world is against you when you're experiencing trauma, but if you look closely, you can usually identify one or two people who have your back. Help children recognise who they are and lean on this positivity to build hope.

4) Children need to feel connected

Noticing the helpers also fosters a feeling of connection during a time where many individuals can feel isolated or alone. For children who are experiencing big emotions in response to an incident, they might think their feelings are wrong or abnormal. Model for the children those uncomfortable emotions. Normalise them by talking about your own response to the situation. Teach children that it's OK not to be OK, and that the feelings they are having are a natural response to a traumatic situation.

What next?

There may be occasions where a child is particularly affected by an incident and may require additional support. At this point, you should seek advice and support from the appropriate external professional.

Equally, it is important to recognise the impact that a critical incident may have on you and, whilst you are best placed to support the young people you work with, please don't forget to put your own 'oxygen mask' on first, before supporting others.

Read more about how Golden Thread Psychology may be able to support your school in our Critical Incident blog.